So yeah, my hard work is at last paying off.  I have found something that actually fuckin’ works for a change.  And should continue to work down the line.

So as I now head right back to work (no, not a bullshit J-O-B), always remember: If it doesn’t work for me, it won’t work for you.  Chase the pipe dream.  Live the pipe nightmare.

Yeah, I believe this is what you’re saying in your mind right now haha.  But I have a reason why I didn’t give yall the AJ and the Rant this week.  I am too busy chasing this pipe dream.  And this blog has been a proven distraction.

In fact, my focus rate has been dwindling.  Yes, I managed to get some work done, but with these IM windows up and my urge to surf YouTube, the Warrior Forum, and look at Cedar Point pictures and videos (which is where I should be going next month, God willing), it has slowed and I haven’t got as much done as I could have.

So not only have I wrote a little notepad detailing my tasks, but I will now be shutting off EVERYTHING.  I will have to learn to suppress my urges and go at this with a full head of steam.  But don’t worry, I will be back soon to fill you guys in on new opportunities, to hate on the fucked up Coporate America a lot more, and ranting about all the online money making crap.

So until then, remember my words: If it doesn’t work for me, it won’t work for you.  Chase the pipe dream.  Live the pipe nightmare.

Basically, it works a lot like other marketing techniques (which I will dabble into in future Opps).  You drive traffic to a landing page and hope a potential viewer completes an action that you want them to complete, giving you a commission.  These actions range from something atrociously simple like submitting an e-mail or a zip code to more complicated things like signing up for an offer (similiar to the Project Payday stuff) or even buying a product (very rare in CPA).  The commissions are also ridiculously low, sometimes as low as a quarter.  But just think – if you can get like, say, 100 people a day to submit their zip code, it is a potential $25 per day.  A cool $750 a month.  I’ll take it.  But hey, of course you still have to do your due diligence and do keyword research, SEO, backlinks, and all of that good stuff.

However, there is one HUGE roadblock that you will have to somehow, someway overcome.  Yeah, nothing comes easy in this crooked ass game called Internet Marketing.  And in the case of CPA, you have to get accepted into the networks.  And let me tell you – that is extremely hard.  You can’t just fill out a form and then start jumping right in.  The CPA networks will be calling your HOME (yes, you will have to give them your real phone number).  They will also be doing an interview.  Interview?!  Did I just say that?  Tell me I didn’t just say that?!  Yep, they have to talk to you over the phone.  Damnit, this reminds me of those bullshit job interviews!  Okay, back on track before I get pissed off.  So yeah, they call you and ask you some questions on how you plan to drive traffic, how long do you plan on promoting their offers, that sort of thing.  They will also be needing proof that you can drive traffic, meaning you’ll have to disclose some of your traffic stats on some of your sites.  And if you’re a newbie, this is impossible.  They are very hard to convince, meaning that you will have to tell them what they want to hear and show them what they want to see.  They want the best of the best, not just anybody.

If you CAN get over this roadblock, and you know how to drive traffic, CPA can be a very profitable opportunity for you.  The first one I actually recommend, even though I haven’t done it myself (because I don’t have the qualifications just yet).  Do a search on Google for CPA networks.  There’s a shitload of them.  And if you can get into CPA, stick with it and you can make some great cash with it.

And as the phone interview ends with the CPA network, give them these final words: If it doesn’t work for me, it won’t work for you.  Chase the pipe dream.  Live the pipe nightmare.

Just when discouragement was creeping in deeper and deeper, I log into my Amazon account today to find out that I sold a product yesterday!  YEAH!  It is my first physical product sale EVER.  Now here is the thing – if I can get even more sales on it, I just MAY choose to flip the site and get instant cash, or I may keep it for a little longer, get MORE sales, and flip it for even more cash haha.  So yeah, I’ve gotta get to work on building more backlinks.  I have just the idea….

BTW, the Opp will still come later today.  Just need to figure out what to write about.

But never forget: If it doesn’t work for me, it won’t work for you.  Chase the pipe dream.  Live the pipe nightmare.

We now return you to your regularly scheduled program, which is already in progress….

Nothing but big and fat goose eggs instead of cash in my Amazon account, though I managed to get 17 click-thrus yesterday (highest yet).  I’m seeing these when I am supposed to be seeing this.

While this is a huge downer, I’m not giving up yet.  I’ve made a few mistakes that I will be ironing out.  In fact, I’m so excited over this new niche I’m going to be attacking.  I don’t know if I’m going to abandon the site I have now, but if things continue to go downhill I may as well.  But the new niche looks promising, and I will take every piece of advice Daniel Brock and Sara Young have gave me and continue with this Amazon thing.

But as more and more goose eggs show up in your Amazon/Clickbank/CPA account, keep this in mind: If it doesn’t work for me, it won’t work for you.  Chase the pipe dream.  Live the pipe nightmare.

Now, onto business.  I have been working hard on my Amazon niche site.  I managed to get some tips from Sara and submitted my articles to Ezine on Thursday.  They got accepted yesterday.  Great perk of being a platinum member!  I have already social bookmarked one of my articles, just gonna do the other ones in the coming days (don’t social bookmark all of the articles in the same day because the SB sites will just think SPAM).  I will also do some other minor link building like a few Yahoo Answering and Blog Comments.  Hopefully this will push the articles up in SERPs and get them noticed more.  Wish me luck.

And never forget: If it doesn’t work for me, it won’t work for you.  Chase the pipe dream.  Live the pipe nightmare.

Well, time to get real with you guys – there are NO “secret” methods out there that will allow you to save time and money in IM.  You WILL have to use the good ol’ elbow grease, and that is WORK.  You see, marketers preach over and over and over again of “secret” methods that should supposedly help the lazy bastards succeed in IM.  Yet when you apply the method and it doesn’t work, those same marketers tell you that you have to WORK.  Sounds contradictory to what you bought (in fact, contradiction is the next Rant, look out for it).

Let me give you an example: Say you’ve been bum marketing and been writing articles very decently, but yet your CTR is very low and you get super low conversions, if any.  You’ve been browsing around and now you learn of a “secret” to increase your CTR and conversions.  So you buy into it, and you find out one of two things – a rehash or just very useless info.  But let’s say that it IS something you personally never heard of.  You apply the damn “secret” method and it doesn’t work.  So you go and ask the author why, and he tells you all kinds of bullshit that you didn’t expect.  Yeah, so much for the “secret”.

So yeah, don’t get fucked over by anyone who claims they have a “secret” method for you to succeed in whatever it is you’re doing.  The formula is simple: WORK, WORK, WORK.  Let me drill that in your head: WORK!  WORK! WORK! W-O-R-K.  23-15-18-11.  If that isn’t what you want to hear, continue to look for those “secrets” that claim they can cut your work time in half.  Find rehashed or useless bullshit.  Rinse and repeat, then come to the realization that you can’t be lazy to succeed in this crooked ass game.

But hey, I will never keep this a secret: If it doesn’t work for me, it won’t work for you.  Chase the pipe dream.  Live the pipe nightmare.

Pass it on to everyone you know.

Here is a well known secret of employers – They don’t pay you what you’re worth.  They pay you what they can afford.  However, they don’t even question you or test you on your intelligence level, work level, or any other tangibles/intangibles you may have, they just say “We’ll start you off with 7.25 an hour and give you a raise every three months”.  Being the mentally poisoned person you are, you immediately nod to the offer, despite having a Bachelor’s Degree AND a Master’s Degree to your credit.

Yeah yeah, I know what you’re saying – At least it’s fuckin’ money!  To keep a roof over your head, keep food on the table, and to support your family.  But think about this – if you were a Harvard or Yales graduate, do you think your IQ would tell you to flip burgers at McDonald’s?  Hell no.  You have pride.  You have an ego.  Stand up for your damn self and don’t settle for less.  And hey, if you had a work ethic that was through the roof and you were willing to bust your ass to succeed, do you think you would be at Wal-Mart ringing up a cash register?  I don’t think so.  You would go out and find BETTER ways to make money.

Here’s a tip for you guys – On the section of the application that says “Expected Hourly Rate”, put what you are worth an hour.  When the employer starts to question you about it, tell him/her why you put that, and if he/she refuses to pay you that kind of money, walk out of the interview immediately.  Biggy said so.

Now, here is the phrase that is worth more than what any bullshit employer can offer you: If it doesn’t work for me, it won’t work for you.  Chase the pipe dream.  Live the pipe nightmare.

The offline niche, also called offline consulting, puts YOU as a middleman between local business owners and customers.  It is your job to generate leads and customers to the local business owner’s business, whether it is an outdoor equipment store (I actually worked in one), a small restaurant, a cleaning company, etc.  To find these local businesses, you have to go online to places like Craigslist and see who is offering what.  You reply, and instead of you being interested in whatever the business is offering, you offer them a lead generation service that will get them more business in exchange of the percentage of the money they make.  So you go about and do your job, and if all goes well and they gain more customers, you get paid.

Sound good?  Well, let me break the news to you guys – don’t even THINK about the offline niche.  I tried it, and I felt bad that I had to leave two people hanging because it just didn’t work.  Lucky for me, they were cool about it.  But let me tell you why you should stay away.  First of all, you may have to do some cold calling.  Fuck that.  It makes you sound like some damn telemarketer, and, excluding the telemarketers themselves, no one on Planet Earth likes them, myself included.

But if you can somehow convince whoever it is you’re calling that you are NOT a telemarketer, that is where we get to problem numero dos: Natural skeptism.  You MUST persuade the business owner that you can generate them more business and more money, but you will have to get paid a percentage.  They obviously will not believe you and will ask if you successfully did that for other local businesses.  What will you tell them then?  Yep, you’re fucked.

If you can somehow get over that hump, then what’s behind problem door number three will also present some bullshit.  If you can convince the business owner that you are the man that can get them more money in their pockets, the deal has to be done contractually.  Yep, legal documents that you and the business owner have to sign.  It is now YOUR duty to fulfill your end of the bargain.  So now you have to go online and do all the super hard work of keyword research, SEO, building websites, getting traffic, getting backlinks, and all of that good stuff.  And, as per the agreement, you only have a set time to do so.  And it won’t be MUCH time because most business owners want to see an improvement PFQ.  Pretty Fuckin’ Quick.  Oh yeah, and believe me – if you DO NOT fulfill your end, the business owner will be in contact with you.  And after you keep making up petty ass excuses, he/she will have a breach of contract and will sue your balls (or ovaries) off.  And THAT, my friend, is where you DO NOT want to be.  Yes sir, money makes this cruel ass world go round.

So please, I cannot stress this enough – don’t even set foot in the offline niche!  Stay far, FAR away!  Stay solely online.  If your people skills aren’t good, I can hear one business owner cursing you out and embarrass you to no end.  Maybe even hurt your feelings.  I can also hear the next business owner saying shit like “Well, if you want money so damn bad, GET A JOB!”  You’ll know then that you have made a 100% Grade A Government Approved ass out of yourself.

So as you’re walking out of that local lawn care company with your head down, empty handed, and humiliated, remember what Biggy told you: If it doesn’t work for me, it won’t work for you.  Chase the pipe dream.  Live the pipe nightmare.

Right now, I am marketing physical products on Amazon.  At the moment I won’t reveal the niche site and everything, but once it is making money, I will gladly show you everything (other marketers just WILL NOT).  Everything is going okay, I ordered some backlinks for the site (dirt cheap for a lot of stuff) and it’s just now up to Google to pick them up, index them, and move my site up in the SERPs.  However, there is one HUGE roadblock that I have encountered – article marketing with physical products.

Basically, I just DO NOT know how to do it in the way that Sara Young recommends in her course, the Article Income Blueprint.  I highly recommend it, by the way.  The thing is, the article she shows in the course is based on a semi-broad buying keyword ( and doesn’t drill down to one specific product).  Out of respect, I won’t reveal that specific article (she most likely wouldn’t want me to in fear of competition), but what I mean by a semi-broad buying keyword is that it is about a specific brand (such as HP Computers), and not like a specific brand AND model (like HP 187666 computer).  What I want to know is how to write an article for the latter.  The good thing is that Sara has been very patient with me up to this point and has been very helpful to me via PM and Skype.  As soon as I get over this hump, I should be good to go.

So yeah, I’ll update you guys again Saturday.  But look for the Opp, the AJ, and the Rant this week too.

But hey, here’s a good idea for a resource box for your articles: If it doesn’t work for me, it won’t work for you.  Chase the pipe dream.  Live the pipe nightmare.

Click here to find out more!

P.S.: Sorry, just couldn’t resist.